mumbles

i was "flipping" through pictures in my whatsapp gallery.

i then realized that my "fruits" have grown so fast.

i'm a total suck..

i was seldom at home watching them growing up,

that i was totally surprised to see how they have grown into.

thinking it over, i have babysit Yayau since he was a toddler.

i have tons of his pictures. still remember how he loves kissing on my cheeks.

oh gosh. those time.

it's true that they were babies only once.

you can never capture that moment again after this.

of all the ku ku (aunts) they have,

i am the one who'd gone missing mostly throughout the year.

sometimes i regret that i was not there to see them growing up.

seriously,

i get jealous seeing other people being so close with their nephews and nieces.

me? haha.. i'm having this problem with toddlers and babies since i was the youngest.

i remembered hiding under my bed when my first nephew - Irfan came into the world.

WHAT KIND OF AUNTIE AM I?

hahaha.

i am so obsessed with my Bungsu thrones that i kept having problem when new baby arrived in our family. 

kehkehkeh.

i asked myself.. what have I done for them anyways?

why can't i be their best aunt just like my other aunts?

okay.. so now i'm like motivating myself to love them even more.

hey, not that i don't love them.

just that i wanted to be more closer to them.

even when i was a child,

i hate when my aunts/uncles went away.

so i didn't want the same thing to happen now. I really wish i can be a good ku ku to the fruits. hehe

baby? oh no.

everyone knows i'm scared of babies.

i never did carry the fruits when they were few months old. only when i had to i guess?

now when we have Mikhail around,

they always asked me to carry him.

I did. but it lasted just few seconds or 5 minutes. OMG. i really am suck. 

Nadia once asked me, "jadi macam mana la kalau ko ada baby nanti?"

mati kutuu. speechless. seriously i have no answer for that.

dengan jayanya bertanya.."macam angkat kucing ka?"

doi..

nasib kakak ipar sia tu ndak da sakit jantung. sabar jak la melayan perangai ipar dia yang penakut baby ni. ntah apa jak la di takut sama baby.

well.. kehkehkeh. 

i have mission for my new room nanti.

which is to print out the pictures of my loved ones,

and make a small corner of memoir in my room. it's always been my dream room. just hope the house would be completing soon so i can get my hands on my room's deco. 

i may not a loving ku ku. but i do love them. i wish i can see them :(